It's Tarot time baby!
I asked myself if I'm doing the right thing in my career ー the Tarot is here to show some guidance.
Last year, I told myself, 2024 is the year I learn something new! One of the things that popped up in my head immediately was Tarot. I have a friend who used to read them and I was pulled into the beautiful illustration of the cards and the analog documentation of it in her notebook was so enticing. I was given a deck of cards for Christmas last year (because you need to be gifted them and not buy them on your own it seems) and little to my surprise, I have been delighted by the ritual ever since. I love routines and learning new things from scratch, especially when it means that I have to turn a page of a book and write notes in my notebook freeform ー it’s stimulating, afresh set of state, and endless possibilities.
Last weekend, I drew some cards in a spread, not the Celtic Tarot Spread because it seems intimidating but there’s a spread called Hexagram spread ー consists of 6 cards and one signifier. It’s a flexible spread, where if you have a specific question, concern or if you want a daily reading, it’s helpful it seems. I had one thing in mind that day which was ーalbeit it feels a little exposing to confess my Tarot question here but I will because it’s the juicy part of the essay todayー “Is my new career going to pan out in some way?
I was a bit weary recently, not just the money aspect, well mostly that, but since marking being a freelancer for a year this month, I didn’t know if it was either succeeding or going anywhere. I’m sort of at a loss how to calculate my “career success”. I’m fine with where I am now, I like the idea of taking it slow and saying “Success doesn’t happen overnight” before bed (I don’t do that, but you know what I mean) and I’m also enjoying the process of finding what I’m good at. Not being caught in the moment and letting everything happen, but making conscious choices along the way is one of the most radical things I have ever done.
So here I am flipping one card at a time, from 1 to 7 and it was not only the guidance I needed but as Rachel Pollack (which I’ll mention multiple times after this!) said in “Seventy-Eight Degrees of Wisdom”, “ーIn this way, they (Tarot) draw us into their mysterious world which ultimately can never be explained, but only experienced.” The cards were at the very least explainable with my little knowledge of Tarot, but it also had to be experienced or else I wouldn’t have seen those cards in a visceral way that really moved me. I can hardly manage to summarize 7 cards in one go, but I will elaborate on some cards that I think are eye-opening. In modern days, we look at something and think, “That seems wrong.” but in the Tarot world, the meaning is open for suggestions, I think!
Organizing the timeline
Card 1: The Past (How is it related to the prompt you asked?)
Six of Pentacles
“6” in Tarot is all about balance and harmony. Pentacles are coins, in this case there are literal coins being splashed. I thought, economic balance or security maybe? This card's divinatory meaning is the harmony in our material lives or collaboration with others.
How are we achieving balance in our material lives? is a question one might ask.
But it is weird…because if you see the card closely…how does this say anything close to balance? If anything, it feels far from it. In our modern society, this man feels like he’s giving money to ‘beggars’ ー far from an equal. There seems to be a hierarchy, but the lower two people apparently doesn’t mean that they are in a ‘weak’ position. Look closely to the scale the Merchant is holding; it’s scaled. Such relationships are often stable. It’s because one wishes to dominate, as well as the others wanting to be dominated as well. Pollack will say, “ーbecause the people are well matched.”
My head is already spinning at this point because my prompt was about my career. My past career was in a corporate life setting that one might think of this exact situation of a hierarchy. The better performed sales person will receive a promotion and money. But the thing about corporate is, stable relationships exists. Come to the work place at a time and place THEY told you to, do the job THEY need done, in return, YOU will get insurance, benefits, free coffee, a salary, and a bonus if you even do better! It is a stable and assured relationship, and I really did enjoy that to some extent. It felt like there was balance, but I also felt like there was more out there, and I was holding my tongue back. I didn’t know what I wanted to do or explore at the time, but I also knew it wasn’t this path anymore, that’s why I quit without a plan. I couldn’t lie to myself anymore.
Arthur Waite, who created the now so called classic Tarot “The Rider Tarot deck”, explains this card, ‘ーa person in the guise of a merchant.” Not a person but ‘in the guise’ of one. Does this mean that we are disguising ourselves to play a part in something that we are not? in order to achieve that balance in our material lives?
Being in the corporate world for 6 years, I did like sales genuinely but I also in some parts hated to follow the customs and rules that the Japanese work culture was imposing me to do in order to be perceived professional. I hated that I was playing the part in the salary women field for a while but I also had to play the game to make it. I liked earning money, it bought me a lot of nice things but it also didn’t allow me to explore anything new. I wasn’t hungry for life. That was a life I needed to probably experience and it wasn’t all bad I swear ー but in retrospect, I’m fine that that’s in the past.
Card 2: The Present (How is it related to the prompt you asked?)
Page of Wands
Just as a general note, cups deal with emotions while wands deal with actions. This card can mean that I am seeking new action at the moment or that now is the time to seek something new?
Card 3: The Near Future (How is it related to the prompt you asked?)
Four of Wands (Reversed)
I felt excited when I drew this because it just looks bountiful, a sign of something good I thought. I wasn’t wrong it seems! 4 in Tarot means solidarity or stasis (a state that does not change.) A canopy of fruit, flowers and greenery,
will ask, “the scaffolding in our lives is very much alive, solid and growing.” I think the groundwork is in process now, and in the near future, very soon, the unfulfilled ‘career success’ or whatever I’m feeling will feel right, if I continue the work. The solidarity also implies that I have co-collaborators around me that I can get support from, I’m not alone which really really feels like a blessing.They are leaving the walled castle to an open air surface, “In other words, their courage and spirit carry them from a defensive situation to an open one.”
But the thing is, I drew in reverse. But Waite says that the meaning will be unchanged. The joy, the felicity, the happiness is so strong that it cannot be ‘blocked’. How assuring and beautiful it is to know that!
Solution (How is it related to the prompt you asked?)
Card 4: The Solution
The Magician
Apparently The Magician signifies a time in your life when you have the power to manifest the outcome you want. It usually can hold meanings like, action, maleness (The wand he is holding shoot up straight, hence phallic!), consciousness. Still only as a baby learner, I enjoy that Tarots have both unity and duality in them, especially the duality aspectー the opposites; male and female, light and dark, death and life etc. I don’t think of it as divisive at all, but more so encouraging. I look at The Magician and I’m given courage and authority to say or do the things I want to achieve, ‘the maleness’ if you would.
The way I’m reaching out to people on linked in for any gigs, or asking people for help, or sending people my CV, all of this that I thought was a lame hustle thing I didn’t want to do, seems authoritative and necessary, like this is where I aspire to be, can you help me?
Reassessment
5: How are your surroundings reacting or feeling? (How is it related to the prompt you asked?)
Temperance
The word temperance means moderation, “節度” meaning self-control. But as Pollack puts it, in Tarot it’s not about being extreme but “it’s a true and proper response to all situations as they arise.”
Temperance comes from the Latin word “temperare” which means “to mix” or “to combine”. When we try to release our inner selves, our authentic self to society, not only do we have moderation to ‘act natural’ but this card challenges us to combine the different sides of our life. For instance, I will never act ‘foreign-like’ in the office to play the Japanese role, but at a bar or restaurant, I code switch with my foreign friends and act differently. We all have that business personality and the private life personality ー it’s fine but it takes us away from experiencing life moment by moment. As you can see in the picture, the water is being mixed together, only to wish that our personalities will flow naturally with our outer world self and inner self.
Just look at the world as it is, receive it as it is, and embrace your surroundings as it is. Perhaps all the answers or support I need is right underneath my nose :)
6: How are you feeling internally or what’s happening with you now? (How is it related to the prompt you asked?)
Death
Normally, Death seems like a scary card, but again it’s not! Without death, nothing new can find its way, and it’s necessary. But what happens with humans is that we know what happens when we die, or at least we know what we look likeーa soulless ghostー our ego gets in the way and we resist death. I think this card is a prompt for us to not resist, and lean in the new beginnings of things and life. Death is often referred to as being transformative, but Pollack says otherwise. “ shows us the precise moment in which we need to give up the old masks and allow the transformation to take place.” Leaning in the change is what I’m going to focus on for future note to self.
The Final Result
7: The final result
Queen of Swords (Reversed)
I feel like the final result of the spread was a cautionary tale but also to remind me of self-care, or at least that’s how I am interpreting it. The Queen of Swords represents sorrow and wisdom. The reversed Queen of Swords emphasizes on the sorrow ー you become someone who makes life much worse than it is. We might perhaps see the world as a malicious place if we don’t open up our minds enough.
A kind reminder that any rejection I get is not the end of the world ー although it might feel like it, I’m doing the groundwork continuously, and that’s all that matters.
I wonder if this was of any interest to anyone…but I do think these prompts in life or ‘signs’ is interesting to look intoー the deeper meaning of the surface level life stuff. The 78 degrees of wisdom I guess!
Here are the resources I’m mostly using for my readings at the moment;
Other Stuff
Each week, I give you some extra things you can read/listen/watch that I consumed and thought was interesting. Here is this week’s edition! If you like this portion of the newsletter, I do a whole section dedicated for it once every month called #juststuff where you can read all the archive here. Enjoy.
Read
I stumbled upon this work ethic note by
the founder of Ghia - very helpful I think!- by wrote this viral piece on You don’t need to document everything and Shameless podcast covered it as well. I can’t believe I missed a Substack viral content, but I really would love to discuss this. because I don’t agree actually to some of it! But if you see the comments, this piece seems to be reaching a lot of the parents and grandparents … but somehow feels highbrow-ish to GenZs and Millennials who are online heavy?
- is always so so insightful for some yum delish internet culture and this no, calling out hyperconsumption is not sexist is really making me rethink my consumerism behavior.
I followed them on Instagram for years, but didn’t know they had a newsletter!
did a piece on Girl hobbies and damn, it got me thinking…like in Japan we have 山ガール(yama-girl), I think hiking does classify as a gold-like hobby where it takes you almost a full day to embark on ー but you rarely probably see mothers doing it… by did a phenomenal piece on it too here ; Who Gets "Quality" Leisure?- 5 ways to write a book this year, although it’s not filled with radical thoughts, I think that’s also the point. I really appreciate the small reminders from other writers ー we can do this <3 Also notebooks!! Yes! I’m in my stationary era too (wink wink)
This “3-4 hour work rule to get creative work done” I think this is how I sort of manage my work load already.
“The truly valuable skill here isn't the capacity to push yourself harder, but to stop and recuperate despite the discomfort of knowing that work remains unfinished, emails unanswered, other people's demands unfulfilled.”
I really really enjoyed
guest column by Does writer’s block actually exist? it happens!! it’s fine! lean in to the discomfort, journal that process, whatever that makes you ‘unblock’ it. So many writers, so many writing methods!
Listen
I think it’s important to note, YES I’m angry that Greta Gerwig and Margot Robbie was not nominated for a single award, both for Best Director and Best Actress ー I think what Zara said in this episode on Shameless was very important on the fact that without Margot Robbie, there wasn’t a Barbie film, without finding Greta to write it there wasn’t one and then to also have Mattel to be on board with it is just so astonishing but yet they were robbed! I don’t like it at all!
Thing Fell Apart Season 2 is back baby!!! Oh wow it’s so good. A look into recents culture wars and moral panic.
A recent pod discovery, A thing or two is pretty fun. A lighthearted podcast, talking about internet trends and current affairs. This one with Alison Roman was a good start to listen to.
One last thing! Search Engine hosted by PJ Vogt is great! Apparently, it’s pretty famous but I just didn’t know. This series was bleak but a necessary listen I think.
Watch
In the mood for love (2000)
My very first Wong Kar-wai film! The New Yorker published an article just recently on it, calling it a ‘90 minute mood piece’ and I agree. The color, the pop of green everywhere that you just cannot miss, the fashion, the elaborate earrings and bracelets, (sometimes a massive towel out of a suit pocket to wipe the face from raindrops?) it was eye-candy. I had no idea that this color scheme and his film is a whole genre on Tiktok… This review was pretty interesting by the New Yorker and the comment by Wong describing the film as “two people dancing together but slowly” is perfectly captured. But I’ll probably add something like, “two people’s attempt to dancing” because it’s not a perfect story or a perfect relationship but that’s also the beauty of life and love, perhaps.
Thank you for reading this week’s love or not to love :) I appreciate you as always, and you can follow me on Instagram megsgumis for some more fun and yum content. As always Bisous x Megumi
You need to watch Happy Together, stat!
This is so beautiful, Megumi! I recently had The Queen of Swords come up in a personal reading and found Rachel Pollack's interpretation from 78 Degrees so moving! Hadn't revisited it in a while. And I also LOVE "In the Mood for Love" - so sumptuous. Have been on a Wong Kar-wai kick lately and had so much fun rewatching Chungking Express, too.